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Out of Essentials

A hot-looking woman gestures alluringly to the bartender who, naturally, comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively leans in toward him and begins to gently caress his full beard.

"Are you the manager?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands.

"Actually, no," the man replies reluctantly.

"Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him," she says, running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair.

"I can't," breathes the bartender. "He's not here. Is there anything I can do?"

"Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues, running her forefinger across the bartender's lips and slipping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.

"What should I tell him?" The bartender manages to say as he kisses her fingers.

"Tell him," she whispers seductively in his ear, "that there is no toilet paper, hand soap, or paper towels in the ladies room."